Grr.

Bloody hell. Last couple of weeks have been hell.

I've gone back to self harm. Broke my knuckles again, then bought new blades and harmed, so arm has to be hidden forever again. Yay(!).

Also, just returned home and I ODed. I have not felt this shit in a long while. I didn't go to get checked out, and for all I know I'm dying right now. Fun... But on the bad side, if I'm not dying then all I'm doing is making myself fat.

I was staying with family due to some issues with my flat and all I did was bloody eat. I don't know why, but I just felt starving always. Things were generally well though, due to harming my voices were quiter, self harm voice more prominent than the others.

Thankfully I've been sort of kicked back to my habits. I'm back home so can get away with stuffs easier, can go running etc, even purge if needs be.

I don't want to be fat, but proper diets don't work as fast. Give me a HEALTHY diet where I can lose a stone in a week, and I'd do it in a shot, otherwise, it's only me it's damaging, it shouldn't matter should it?

Hmm, thinspo to come, I have to get back to dieting.